I’m mindful of the fact that people read my blog and I’m grateful for it. I have no doubt though, that my blog posts are not very happy and upbeat this week. I’m not myself and I know it. So if you are looking for some upbeat peppy weight loss blogging from me today I’m sorry to say it’s not in the cards. Maybe tomorrow.
I have struggled over the last 4 days or so with eating. Rather than going on a binge, I am not eating. I don’t think I have had 400 calories today. About the same yesterday. And the day before. I have missed both workouts with my trainer this week because of bad headaches. And I’m depressed. I just can’t seem to get it together. I’m sort of a little scared for myself right now. I’ll come through this but right now it’s very tough.
This is the hidden part of abuse. The part where I would rather just go to sleep and stay asleep. I was told today that maybe I should learn to have no expectations that way I would never be disappointed. Sounds like escapism to me but he said it is Buddhism.
Anyway, sorry I’m being a bummer blogger right now. The fog will lift when it’s ready. I don’t need any tough love right now. I just need comfort. And if you believe in it, prayer too please.